“Flee Sexual Immorality”
[I Corinthians 6:18-20]
March 17, 2019, Second Reformed Church
We now turn to the third commandment of the Second Table of the Law – the seventh commandment – remembering that the basic thrust of all the commandments of the Second Table is to love our neighbor as we love ourselves.
And so we read, “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14, ESV).
In googling the word, “adultery,” we get the definition of “sexual relations between a married person and someone who is not his or her spouse.”
And many of us breathe a sigh of relief, don’t we? “Well, at least I haven’t broken that one,” we think.
But there is a problem in thinking this way, and we see it, first, as we find, adultery is more than adultery.
Let us hear the words of Jesus:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery” (Matthew 5:27-32, ESV).
This is from the Sermon on the Mount – that part of Scripture that even non-believers think we should believe – as they call it, “the ethic of Jesus” – but what they really refer to is not the whole of the Sermon on the Mount, but the Beatitudes – and their understanding of them – which is wrong.
We begin with the idea that it is sin to commit adultery. We are not to have sexual relations with a married person who is not our spouse. And most of us can agree on this. If someone is married, as the Bible says, they are “one flesh” with their spouse, so, we ought not to defile that union through adultery. After all, it could cause a divorce – and what if there are children involved? We have to think of the children.
But Jesus, in the beloved Sermon on the Mount, says that it is not just married people and it is not just a physical act, but any physical or mental sexual action towards or with the body of a person who is not your spouse – all of this is included in what is termed the sin of adultery.
And many of us have trouble with that. Certainly, non-Christians have trouble with that. “If it’s two consenting people and no one gets hurt, what’s wrong with that?” “How can you compare lust to adultery? Adultery can result in serious consequences – lust is just in your mind – and everybody lusts, surely.” “What’s wrong with looking at a woman or a man and thinking – that person has the type of body I think I would enjoy being with? That doesn’t hurt anyone.”
That’s certainly that way our society tends to think – look at the adultery of our Presidents – John F. Kennedy, Bill Clinton, Donald Trump – probably others. And we tend not to think too much about it unless the President is on the other side of the isle from us.
“Boys will be boys. It’s all part of growing up.”
In 1975, then Presidential candidate, Jimmy Carter, confessed, “I’ve looked on a lot of women with lust. I’ve committed adultery in my heart many times.” (https://www.ajc.com/news/when-jimmy-carter-lusted-his-heart/kzdD5pLXvT3qnf5RyJlIiK/)
And you may remember that the media ripped Jimmy Carter up and down their pages and shows for equating lust and adultery. Whatever you might think of President Carter and his presidency, he understands what this commandment means.
This commandment forbids any physical or mental sexual action towards or with the body of a person who is not your spouse.
“Well, what would you have a person do?”
Biblically, we are only to have sexual relations with our spouse or be celibate. And we are to train our minds to focus only on good things – appropriate things.
But our society says there is nothing wrong with physical and mental adultery, and it is even normal and useful for prospective partners to be together before they commit to each other, and also just to let off steam and to enjoy another person.
So, besides the obvious reason of, God says so, why should we not commit adultery? Why should we only have sexual relations with our spouse or remain celibate?
Second, three reasons why we should flee from sexual immorality.
First, sexual sin is against our own body.
“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.”
In physical sexual immorality – as well as in lust – adultery broadly defined – there is a “becoming one” with the body of another person. So, if you and I have physical relations – or if even you just looked at me and desired me – thinking about wanting physical relations – a union occurs. And when we part from one another, there is a tearing apart that changes or marks or disgraces us.
And you might think, “Well, with two people who are together physically and then break up without ever being married there can be something – an ongoing pain, but lust? I don’t know about that.”
If you are unsure, consider pornography. Studies have shown that as a person uses pornography more and more, there are actual changes in the wiring of the brain. This is from lusting after strangers who are not your spouse. (https://fightthenewdrug.org/how-porn-changes-the-brain/)
We damage our bodies when we sin sexually.
Second, the body of the believer is the Temple of the Holy Spirit.
“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?”
God the Holy Spirit lives in – indwells – every believer. And we know that God is holy, holy, holy, so to be in the body of someone who is engaged in sexual immorality – adultery – is intolerable to God Who lives in us. We are affectively saying that we would rather be filled with the stench of sin than keep ourselves clean for God.
We weaken ourselves spiritually and distance ourselves from God as we continue in sexual immorality.
And third, our bodies don’t belong to us.
“You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
And this will confuse and infuriate some people who believe that their body is their body and theirs to do with as they want. But it is not. Our bodies were gifted to us by God through our mothers to be used to glorify God. And in order that we would not suffer eternally in Hell in body and soul, Jesus lived and died and rose and ascended to purchase us – body and soul – for Himself and to the glory of God the Father.
Peter tells us, “knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot” (1 Peter 1:18-19, ESV).
For the Christian – the believer – all the more so, since we have been bought by Jesus, our bodies – all that we are – are His to command. And the Scripture clearly teaches that one man and one woman should be married and enjoy each other, and all others are to remain celibate in body and mind.
And we may consider the extent of this and wonder who can keep pure? Who can keep from this sin? And the answer is Jesus. Jesus did not commit adultery in His body or mind. Jesus is a real human being and kept from adultery all thirty-three years of His life. And we have God the Holy Spirit living in us, so, if we desire, as we should, not to sin – but to flee from all sexual immorality – God will give us the power to flee and not sin, if we ask Him for it.
Third, how else do we flee from sexual immorality?
Thomas Watson, in his book, A Body of Divinity, gives us some help:
Don’t be around people who want you to commit sexual immorality. If your friends are all seeking sexual relations, you will likely be pulled into what they are doing – so stay away. Get new friends.
Reject sexual immorality when it comes to your mind by calling out to God for help. Paul reminds us:
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you’ (Philippians 4:8-9, ESV).
Don’t speak or act in such a way as to encourage others to engage you in sexual immorality.
Don’t be around people you lust after.
We all have different temperaments and temptations. If watching R-rated movies causes you lust, don’t watch them. If Classical music causes you lust, don’t listen to it. If going to the beach causes you to lust, don’t go there. If reading romantic books causes you to lust, don’t read them. We have to know ourselves and the ways in which we are led into sexual immorality that others may not be.
As much as possible, do not be alone with someone of the opposite sex –or, whomever you are attracted to.
Don’t drink too much – it can cause you to let your guard down and do things you wouldn’t normally do.
Love your spouse lavishly.
Delight in the Word of God and regularly spend time in it, hearing God’s Word.
Pray that you would not to sin.
Look at every person as a bearer of the Image of God. Sexual immorality is an attack on the Image of God that a person bears. Look at a person not merely as a piece of meat that you desire, but as a person who bears the Holy Image of God -- someone you should love as a one of God’s creations who uniquely bears His Image. Someone you should seek to protect and lead in the ways of God.
Is this easy? Of course not. Paul wouldn’t have spent so much time in his letters condemning and correcting sexual immorality in the church if it was easy. However, you can become more sensitive to it as you seek not sin sexually by following these and other methods. And don’t be afraid to ask a fellow Christian to help you – to work with you and pray with you to keep from these types of sins. We ought to be there for each other in whatever way possible – according to how we have been gifted.
We live in a culture in which “sex sells.”
The print ad of the topless woman is obviously for jeans.
The print ad of the man in his underwear is obviously for a watch.
And in our movies – we even have an expression for some scenes – “gratuitous sex.”
In Paul’s letters, he writes about how wonderful the marriage relationship is, and how wonderful single celibacy is – being as he was – able to give more time and resources to the work of the church. And he writes:
“Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: ‘It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.’ But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
“Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another” (1 Corinthians 7:1-7, ESV).
Paul is not saying that marriage is second best to single celibacy. He is saying that some people are gifted for single celibacy and some are prepared for the gift of marriage and the mutual submission of bodies to each other, in joy and pleasure and reproduction. He is telling the Corinthians not to force someone to be celibate who obviously has no gift for it, but to let them marry, as they have been gifted to do.
If you have been gifted to single celibacy, God knows what it is to be a single celibate human, and will help you to be single and flee sexual immorality. If you have been gifted to be someone’s spouse, go and be married and enjoy the blessings of married life, pray alone and together to flee sexual immorality and to cling to each other and look upon no other, and God will help you.
However we are gifted, let us look at each other as bearers of the Image of God. Let us treat others with the compassion and love that God has given us through Jesus. Let us think on these things and pursue holiness in mind and body.
Let us pray:
Almighty God, our inclination to sin makes it easy for us to follow after sexual immorality, as do the pleasures of the flesh. Yet, You have promised to give us what we need to be Your people each day, and we ask that You would keep us from sexual immorality today, that we would not lust after others, that we would not have sex with people who are not our spouse, and that we would not have sex with the spouses of others. Lord help us to be faithful in our sexuality. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
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